Questionable Behavior

I really am not a judgement person but it may be hard to believe that after reading this post. I love making reborns and I love collecting them too. I have however removed myself from several reborn based Facebook groups because of some “collectors “ behavior. Reborn pregnant and in labor etc are all used in good fun on these forums but the level some of these people go to is exceedingly strange. For example, just today someone posted that she intends to take her reborns to Bass Pro because they are offering free pictures with Santa and what did everyone think about that? How did they think people would react, etc. I was the first person to post an answer and I said “I don’t think it would be advisable to do that. Although I know you love your baby she isn’t real. Maybe you should take some personal pictures in front of the Christmas tree?” I think that is pretty close to exactly what I said. I didn’t want to come off harsh or put the woman down. I do not get this sort of behavior. I do get comfort from my reborns by holding them when I am not feeling well or am upset. However, I do not treat the doll as if it were real. It doesn’t have a bedtime, mealtime, bath time, etc. As someone who lost not just one but two babies I do not understand how a doll could ever replace a real child. How someone would treat it as a real child. I understand making memorial babies to honor a child you lost, but.... I don’t know any other way to to say what I am feeling.

Do you not feel that these sorts of events are made for living breathing children? It almost feels like she would be taking advantage of someone by taking the doll to this sort of activity. However, there are tons of comments under this post that say they are planning on doing the same thing. One lady even put her reborns with Santa picture up from a previous year. I do feel that these people have something mentally wrong with them. I know we make reborns for people in nursing homes that have Dementia these dolls comfort them because they are mentally regressing backwards in their brains. They are mentally impaired. Am I being too judgmental? Too harsh?

No...not at all....

I don't collect, first...I don't have room....and secondly....my joy comes from the creation of the baby!!

I do think some of these women like the ones you are talking about are going overboard....I think it's an
attention seeking behavior though.....

I do see how these babies bring comfort/are therapeutic because I do love to cuddle mine before
they go off to their new Mommies!! Just something about holding them seems soothing......but I have
no desire to take them into public places and act like they are real....

Thanks, I am glad that you feel the same way. To me they are mainly works of art that sit on a shelf and my keepers were made by artists that I admire.

I’m kind of in between. I know what you’re saying and some do take it to the extreme. I don’t take a baby out in public unless someone is interested in seeing it example at our military base exchange a friend of mine works there and she was always admiring my pictures and she wanted to see one so I brought one in for her to see but I was not treating it as a real baby. I did however, at Halloween put two of my babies in Halloween costumes and put them out Side with me as I was handing out candy to the little kids. I was trying to drum up some business.it was fun a lot of people interested.

That is the only time I have taken mine out in public is to advertise or for a show.

Shannon ... I totally get what you're saying about the people who treat these like real babies. It makes me shake my head and wonder what they see about these babies that I don't. When my daughter's were little (like 4-6) they totally immersed themselves in the reality of their babies. I would get a harsh scolding if I didn't respect their parenting skills. lol But come on ... they were 4 years old! They're supposed to invest their imagination in the reality of play, right?

Going to the ROSE show has been a real eye opener for me and some really great lessons in how to accept a WIDE variety of doll lovers. Before I went to ROSE, the doll shows I've been to were very "global" in their offerings ... antiques, Barbies, collectibles, etc. Typically I'm the only reborn artist there, so I never was exposed to such a large number of people who give their babies an identity.

At first it was very difficult not to be critical of their degree of "love" for their babies. Typically I don't even name my dolls ... I leave that to whoever buys them. Yet at the ROSE show I had women who were shocked that I hadn't given them names yet. Really??? lol I find myself almost uncomfortable because I don't know how to accept something I truly find weird ... and then I remind myself it takes all kinds to make the world go around.

God's greatest gift to us is choice. Do I find the women who have strollers or back packs or front slings (whatever they're called) for their babies a trifle bizarre?? Um ... heck yeah!! I too have left some Facebook groups where it seems to be a place for everyone to share what their babies ate, or were cranky and needed a nap ... that's just not my cup of tea. But, as hard as it is for me, I try to accept their choices ... as long as they don't attempt to force me to enter into their world with them.

Having said all that ... and how I don't treat my babies like living entities ... one of my best doll stories is because a woman judged me to be a bit crazy years ago. lol I was making porcelain dolls then and as I was rearranging my table at a doll show, I thunked a baby's head when I laid her down. She was a sleeping baby (it's important to remember that part), and I scooped her up and cuddled her and told her I was so sorry for bonking her head on the table. Laid her back down more carefully and when I looked up there was a lady standing there just staring at me. "Do you always talk to your dolls?", she asked. With a smile I said yes of course I do! "Do they ever answer you?", she asked. Looking down at the baby ... I looked back up at her and said very straight faced ... "Not when they're sleeping." She just shook her head and walked away while I laughed and told the baby "Don't worry ... I wouldn't let anyone like that buy you anyway!"

That is hilarious Sharon! As I probably already said I just felt like the Santa Claus this was really over the top. It almost seemed like they are taking advantage. It was free pictures with Santa and their place in line could’ve knocked a living child out of the opportunity. It also just seems silly. I am already a bit hesitant of revealing that I am a doll artist to people who are not in the reborn community. A lot of people believe that this is how we all feel. It doesn’t help when collectors behave this way.

I love Dolls. Have collected since childhood.

Really have enjoyed the Reborn Dolly World since discovering
them about 11 years ago. Began creating them 10 years ago and
Love it!  

Do some dress up, play with or obsess over them? I suppose so    
But, to each their own. I enjoy my interaction with all types of Dolly
People. From the Artist, Collector, Extreme Baby Mamma...it makes me  


Many find them unique and fascinating. Some find them odd. I don't get bothered
nor let others sway my choices. It's my decision what I go or enjoy. I am sorry to hear you
feel you must keep your creative life making them hidden. Thats part of the fun.  

The Santa thing, I'm sure some were interested, some enjoyed and some
may think it is odd...but, with all the unhappy people and unpleasant occurrences
out there I say, spread the joy!  

If it is harmless to others and keeps them happy  

It's fine with me... I've been called a "Free Spirit " many times in my life. My Mother
loved that about me... So do I  

Sharon you cracked me up, still smiling.

I have various reborn dolls, two sit in a wicker chair and a high chair in the dining room, they were my first ever reborn
doll but never take them out of their seats, they get dusted same as other stuff.

In the lounge end I have a pouffe that holds a full bodied silicone doll, plus a 12" one, two 10" ones and a 7" one, and
another l7 inches one will be with me soon, but they are not played with, I use them as models when asked to make
clothes for similar size dolls, I use the full bodied silicone as a model to show that sleeves are not necessary.

I do not play with them ever, I also have a very large Peter Rabbit, Pooh Bear and Eyeore all about l8" tall that sit
in various places on the lounge floor along with two Masterpiece dolls, I just like them and see no reason why they
cannot be placed. Hubby is quite happy to have them, he even tells the two Masterpiece dolls to behave themselves
when we go away lol. I used to get a lot of odd comments from friends, but they take me as I am, and as some of
them have been friends for almost 60 years I must be ok. lol

Shannon, I agree with you. I understand what you're saying. As a nurse, it do get concerned about some people who go overboard to the point where they seem to think it's real or is a replacement for real. I saw a few women in a group on BF asking how they could breastfeed their reborn. I left the group at that point. I do think there are those who are mentally disturbed and of course they can't fully help themselves, and what they need is help. If they want to do whatever with their reborn, yes that's fine but at the same time, they really shouldn't put it in other people's faces. That's where it gets most disturbing, when they want others to accept or sympathize with their overboard reborn behavior. I think taking them out to see Santa is an attention-seeking behavior that is related to something not quite mentally right. They don't realize the line and that they're crossing it, especially in front of others. There are mentally handicapped people who do treat a reborn more like a real baby, but that is understandable.

For the first time, last week, I took a doll out with me that I'd just finished, and I wanted to advertise and also see what people's reactions would be. I took it with me to my son's tai kwon do class. Several people were quite interested in it and people wanted to hold it, and they were amazed at how real it felt in their arms. Many had never seen a reborn in person. The extent of this hobby for me is creating them and selling them. I'm not a collector but may end up making a few keepers to demonstrate my work for local people and to put on display. But I don't have any interest in dressing them all the time, although I don't think there is anything wrong with those who dress them up and change their outfits every so often. Most of the ladies I've seen who do that do it for display and good fun.

Sharon, your story is so funny!

Shannon, I get what you're saying...years ago, when there was a ton of negative publicity on tv about reborns and people thinking they were real and taking them out in strollers etc, it gave reborning a bad name for awhile and made the artists look like we were all wackos for making them, like we were the ones that thought they were real. meanwhile, very few people I ever sold to were weird. Most were true collectors that just loved dolls or certain artists or sculptors.

Unfortunately, you always get the few out there that push the boundaries and make people uncomfortable and will put their "baby" on Santa's lap for their free picture. And no, I don't think it's fair. Not when kids are waiting in line waiting to see Santa and some lady is in front of them with a doll. I think that's ridiculous.

We brought our dog once...that was fun. But I wouldn't do that on "bring your child day for a free picture with Santa"

That being said, I do talk to my babies even while I'm painting them. Not because I think they are alive and can hear me....I don;t know...maybe I just talk too much...maybe they are just too darn cute not to talk to them!